Am I Going Right?
"... we often rationalize taking the wrong direction when we come to these forks in the road. Our heart wants to accomplish great things in our lives, yet we rationally argue that taking the easy, safe route is the most logical. It's our critical mind that wants to interject and tells us to do the smart thing. But it is our logical mind which should be telling us to take the harder choice. Too many times our mind overrides our desires, and we end up with the result that we don't really want. But that's the trick because while we rationalize the easy choice, it's actually the harder, more demanding direction which is logically more sound... Self-sacrifice will always be an option and easier than self-respect."
- Logan Gelbrich, Going Right
His concept really struck me as I read through the pages of Gelbrich's (@funtionalcoach) book, Going Right.
The book aggregates content and concepts from multiple sources, to provide, as he would term it, “the logical justification for Going Right.”
I had bought this book after following Melanie's (@melaniesylim) journey on instagram having met this amazing girl a couple of times in Singapore. Give her a follow! She has amazing content and meets like-minded people with a passion for life, and has been awesome in introducing these people to this side of the world.
anyway, I have been in a fluctuating state of certainty and questioning this path that I am on. i honestly LOVE IT. but everything else in the logical existence of the world tells me that it does not make sense.
I have a degree (and had a job) that would give me an income that is a multiple of what I earn now. i had chosen this path for many reasons, personal and spiritual motivations alike. And to many people this should be enough for an unwavering course forward.
I mean, it’s all well and good to be firm about my decision to follow this path but in the context of an Asian society, things are very different. We want validation from the people around us, not because we need that security, but we require validation because it is a form of honor. And to this day, the stress of the cycle to consider an alternative path that deviates from what I have already set my mind to will continue.
Yes, we do need to be motivated by intrinsic factors rather than extrinsic factors. but what if extrinsic factors prod a 3mm thick needle into your subconscious when you are the most vulnerable?
We now live in a generation and a world where we are fortunate enough to search for meaning in everything we decide to assimilate in our lives. Meaning in the different roles that we play, for me as a daughter, group leader at church, and as a coach & box owner.
While our generation is fortunate, we have to contend with the challenge to change the mindset of those who came before us. And though the answer is simple, it is difficult to achieve. We show them success as they would define success. Actual attainment of a tangible, recognisable goal as defined by society, with a personal focus on the journey and its meanders as we get there.
In our return trip from Cape Town, I struck up a conversation with a South African couple. They would have a 12-hour layover in Singapore before continuing the flight to Phuket. I asked, “why not shorten the layover and take the plane immediately?” after all, it was Phuket (which is relatively close to Singapore) and there would be flights in one form or another every hour. But his response surprised me. He said “it’s a journey really, and i’ve decided to enjoy every bit of it.”
My instinctual reaction would be to get over the icky bits of flying ASAP. So a 13h flight path with a 2h transit in between would have been the preferred option rather than the same flight path with a 12h transit in between.
But then I’d miss the opportunity to experience life in that pit stop along the way.