• Cass Lau


Hey Team, it's me again! It seems like I only get some space to write when I'm travelling so my posts are few and far in between. But with this being my sixth post for the year, I'm giving myself a pat on the back for a job well done.

It's now 9:45AM and I am in the stunning Villa Sophia in Ubud(-ish), and having these strange reflective thoughts because I am in a room by myself for the first time in a long time.

I look at my room and wonder if this is what my life would look like if I moved out of my parents and lived alone. I do hope my future looks somewhat tidier than this.

Here's the picture right now: Me sleeping on one side of the bed, the side further away from the door because I do get scared sometimes, with my laptop next to me and bag on the other side, for easy access when I get back/leave for the day. My clothes for the next day nicely(?) laid out on the side chair so I do not have to use my morning brain to figure out what I need to wear in the wee hours of the morning.

So here's what I'm reflecting on.

I turned 30 on the 17th of October AND BOY WAS IT ... superbly underwhelming (italicizeboldunderline). A part of me just wanted to check off this milestone and let it blow away unnoticed (to the point that I was avoiding get-togethers), but another part of me looked in jealousy at my friends commemorating this year with freshly baked babies and career milestones and wished that it was my story too. My ambivert personality is highly schizophrenic.

I had the lofty goal of completing 30 ring muscle-ups over the course of the day, but instead, it was spent with work meetings and the occasional workout.

Don't get me wrong, it's not that I'm complaining! But that day more than ever I asked myself, what would a NORMAL thirty year old be doing on their birthday and think I am totally not normal at all.

I kind of figured that out at 26.

I was on track to checking off all the boxes on what a "good Singaporean Girl" should aspire to have:

✅Go to good schools, and a good local University

✅Get a cushy corporate 9-6 job with a definite career progression

✅Earn enough $ to enjoy post-work life


❎TBC: Getting married, kids, a HDB etc. etc.

^ BUT this plan was derailed when I left the corporate world for a life of uncertainty. But I was not ready for the curveballs that would come incessantly since then. Still, it keeps life exciting 😉

If I thought 2020 was bad... 2022 takes it to a whole new level. I have been through the worst and darkest moments in 2022 alone, and I would be lying if I denied wishing that my life would stop at 30. But in these dark moments, pockets of light have shone through, just enough to give me hope to move forward.

Here's me also attempting to list down all the things that have happened since Jan 2022. Warning, you WILL hate my sentence structure but it is just meant to be a long prose.

[start] I hosted the Invictus Gymnastics Seminar, got COVID, my house caught fire, did the open with a 2nd degree burn, fell out with my best friend, got my CrossFit Level 2 in Korea, restructured Spoilmrkt, ran a few events, closed 5 new clients, assisted athletes for the SWF meet, restructured Actualize CrossFit and started on a mentorship programme with TwoBrain business, hosted the CrossFit Gymnastics Seminar and obtained my certificate, and there are more things lined up into the end of 2023. [end]

HOW COOL IS THAT. I have lived, loved, laughed, and lost, and I know it will happen again and again, even as 2023 brings a whole NEW EVENT on the Actualize CrossFit side that will be coming up that is SUPER exciting... stay tuned!

In the meantime, here are 4 things I have found have changed since getting older:

  1. Birthday presents that are not CAKE - unless you baked it yourself or know me damn well... don't get me anything edible please. I am pickier than you think. Buy me a meal or a coffee - I'd much prefer the time spent with you then.

  2. SMALL gatherings, I loved the 5 pax COVID-restriction - YAY for that, because I am getting older and I do appreciate dedicated time with special people a whole lot more.

  3. I'm HYPER SENSITIVE to niggles and pains - I blame the girls (you know who you are) for wishing me "indigestion, back pain, heart burn, etc." on my 30th, but I've been interpreting every ache as a sign of AGE. Maybe it's just a self-fulfilling prophecy.

  4. I've stopped caring about age - could be denial, could be because I have better things to worry about 🤷🏻‍♀️

SO, even though I am time-pressured to get married and settle down and crank out some kids (oops I need to get into a relationship first 🤪), I'm just going to work damn hard at what I have in front of me, and ride with things as they come.

The ducks are lining up (is that the phrase??). I am looking forward to an Actualize CrossFit that is stronger than ever from the inside-out, and a Spoilmrkt that will continue to grow, starting with a solid core team.

And this is why I KNOW my thirties are going to be pretty damn awesome.




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